I saw her in a railway station walking towards me. We had a brief eye contact, and I let her pass. As she walked away, I noticed her athletic attire, as if she had just come from the gym. I decided to approach her, engage in conversation, and eventually exchange numbers. I texted her the next day, and she responded positively.
I offered to meet up either on the same day or another day, but she declined, mentioning that she wasn’t in the mood to socialize or go outside. I sent a follow-up text without sounding needy, commenting on her response. She replied and asked about the timing of our meeting.
Since she preferred not to go out, she invited me to her place for tea, mentioning that it was also her friend’s apartment. I wasn’t sure about the nature of the meeting but decided to go for it. When I arrived, I found out her friend wasn’t home and might return later. We sat in the kitchen on uncomfortable chairs, facing each other, creating a somewhat formal atmosphere. I changed my seating position to make it less serious.
We had tea, but she didn’t offer any alcohol or snacks. I knew escalating in her room might be challenging, as there was no bed or laptop. However, I was prepared at my place in case the opportunity arose. I subtly created some distance by checking my phone and visiting the toilet occasionally. We went to the balcony a few times, and I initiated light physical contact. She responded with a somewhat surprising question, asking why I was touching her. I didn’t dwell on it and continued.
The conversation was going well, but there were moments when she expressed disapproval of my teasing or jokes.
For instance, while browsing her Instagram photos, I made a comment about a bad photo, and she reacted with, “So, you just sit at my place and criticize my pictures…?” I changed the topic without responding.
We played a questions game, but it didn’t become very spicy. We spent about two hours at her place, and I felt it was time to transition or end the date. She mentioned checking when her friend would return, and I took it as an opportunity to suggest watching a comedy at my place, as I had a laptop. She agreed without hesitation.
At my place, we watched a comedy in my bed. I attempted to kiss her at one point, and though she initially rejected me, it was in a teasing manner. I continued with comfort building and eventually kissed her. The escalation went further, with her becoming touchy and eventually taking things to a more intimate level.
Afterward, I offered her to stay the night, and she agreed. We had sex, and afterward, I asked her about her initial thoughts when we first met. She revealed that she had hoped I wouldn’t approach her as she needed to use the restroom and catch her train. Due to our conversation, she had to hold it. We shared a laugh, and I said, “Well, it was worth it.”
Lessons learned:
1. Don’t apologize for teases and jokes; don’t react, just change the subject.
2. Go as far as you can when she’s comfortable with it, even if it involves pulling out intimate items. Don’t miss an opportunity by being too reserved.
3. Go for the next move even when you are not sure.